Monday, October 28, 2013

All the Lessons Learned in Motherhood Thus Far

Hi friends!
I wrote this post a while back as a guest post for Ashley over at A Nelson's Nest and wanted to share a few tidbits that I learned since I became a mom. I was a nanny for many years, and the oldest of lots of children, but something about when they handed me my baby made me so unbelievably excited but also freaked out by everything that was to come. When I babysat, those kids came with an instruction manual so to say and here was my beautiful baby girl and I was having to write the manual for her. Talk about scary! Its been quite the ride, but I love being a mom more than anything else and I am so blessed by our sweet girl!

   The week of my due date I was counting down the moments and hoping that at any second I would go into labor, but as my due date came and went {I went to the beach on my due-date}, time seemed like it stopped and I was praying and trying everything imaginable to make that baby come. Anyone else with me? No, I'm the only one? Okay. Excellent.

The day of my due-date
Little bit about me:
 I am a first time Mom, though I am the oldest of many, many children, and was a nanny for seven years, so having a baby felt simple. I thought I knew exactly what was up a head, and boy has my mind been blown several many times. I have the greatest husband, the cutest pup, we live in sunny, hot, Florida and I am a Worship Leader. There is hardly a dull moment in our crazy, chaotic lives, and honestly I wouldn't change a thing. Paisley is the highlight of my blog, almost every post is for her, but truth be told, sometimes I just have to write about everything else in-between the girl that stole our hearts. 

I thought today I would share a few lessons that motherhood has taught me in this short, crazy, fun-filled ride I am on. Please feel free to add to this list too :)

Teething really sucks. I really wish that someone would have told me way a head of time, what I was getting myself into. Paisley just cut two teeth and it has been anything less of glamorous for us, or well, for me. She has stopped eating, stopped sleeping, stopped nursing like she normally does and she has become constipated all.the.time, all the while, she seems happy during the day. Its been a rough ride with these little toothers and I cant imagine how much worse it might get. Eeek! Prepare yourselves Momma's because even though they are in tremendous pain, you will be wishing that you could hide out in your closet all day, praying when you open that door its all over. Seriously. 
Breast pain. I am sure you all are sighing about this and wishing we could skip thism, and yes, really for my sake I wish I could skip this, but holy heck does it hurt. I joke with my husband that its almost as bad as contractions! No lie. When you have bleeding, sore, cracked nipples, the whole shebang, its sooo not fun at all. I knew it would hurt to some extent, but this is pain that literally takes your breath away sometimes. Breastfeeding for us has been up and down, up and down. You can read about the madness herehere, and here. I couldnt imagine giving my baby anything else, but its definitely given us our fair share of trouble. Who knew it would be so hard and so complicated?

Sleep deprivation is at its all time finest. Coffee, Coffee, Coffee!! Luckily, well until recently, Paisley has been a great, natural sleeper. She practically was sleeping through the night when we brought her home, and then the teeth started appearing and all that "sleeping" went out the window. Now she is up every hour to three hours sometimes. I honestly dont know how you mothers out there with babies that wont sleep, do it. I remember doing all nighters in college, and yes, I was messed up for a few days, but this takes exhaustion to a whole new level. They say sleep when your baby sleeps, but how is my house going to clean itself? Clearly, I am going to be the one that has to do it, and when you ask, while the baby is sleeping. Duh. Aint nobody got time to sleep while baby sleeps.
Multi-tasking. I am a great multi-tasker, but now with a baby, multi-tasking takes on a whole new meaning. Who knew that you could nurse your baby, while eating, while putting on make-up, while emailing, while making phone calls, or while, lets be honest ladies, using the restroom. You learn to do many a thing, when you have a baby. Its a great thing that God wired us woman to be able to have so many "open windows" so we could save the world all in one breath. Thats how it feels sometimes am I right??

Baby blues are for real. I really hate this subject, but I wish more than anything someone would have talked to me about this one. Let me be real for a moment. I thought I would totally be exempt from this one, and thought no way will I go through that because I will be able to see and hold my baby and life will be grand. Boy was I wrong. The day my mom left, every emotion and every hormone in my body just had a hay-day. I remember just sobbing and sobbing for weeks, and I honestly dont even know why. I missed being pregnant at times, even though I felt so uncomfortable for half my pregnancy, but every thought about being pregnant, her moving inside of me, hearing her heartbeat and doctors visits made me just bawl. I have no idea. I should have been happy she was here, but there was a part of me that just really missed having her be inside of me and being connected. When I had to return the hospital pump I cried. I cried all the way home from my six week doctor check-up, I cried when I thought of my mom not being able to help me, and sometimes I just cried. Sometimes it felt as if I had no control over my body and it would just cry. There would be no rhyme or reason for it. I fear having another baby and having to deal with the "baby blues" because for me, that seriously was the worst part about the whole process. Its the one thing that I do remember clearly. I dont understand why more woman dont speak out. We all experience it, most I should say experience this and it would be so much more helpful if we had other outlets besides just husbands and mothers to help us through the roughest part.

Sex after a baby. Yes I am going there. For me, after having a baby, I felt so un-sexy and so not in the mood a lot of the time in the beginning. I ended up with a few stretch marks and that was enough to put the brakes on and want to be covered from head to toe. And the loose belly fat from being so stretched out made me feel anything less than desirable. It does take time getting use to again, but let me tell you a secret... have fun and get a little crazy and get a little outside of yourself, and be the wife that you were before you were a mother because how do you think that baby got there in the first place?? Just because you have a baby doesnt change anything or who you are. Your body may look a little different, but you aren't a different person, you're a mommy, but you are still that same wife too :)

You learn to love deeper. Before Paisley arrived, so many people told me that you will never be able to understand what love is really like till you have a child, and they were right. I love my husband dearly, more than words could ever really say, but the love that I have for Paisley is something that I never thought I could feel. I cant even explain it, but she has definitely taught me to love so much deeper and so much harder. She makes every bad day totally worth it, and one smile completely turns my world upside down. Having a child is one of life's greatest creations and rewards. There is no greater love than the love you have for a child and meeting them for the very first time. 
"You" goes out the window. We can all just laugh here because I know that I am not the only one who feels this way. I cant even remember the last time that I got full on ready, took a long hot shower {if you are a momma-to-be, enjoy this now!!}, shaved my legs and my armpits, did the works. I am 100% ok if Paisley is dressed to the nines while I have at least managed to get my teeth brushed. Most of my days consist of a fast shower, throwing my bangs back, mascara, blush and a little powder. My routine use to take me 45 minutes to an hour and now it takes me about 20-30 minutes. That is some big improvement y'all and my parents are probably secretly shocked for this girl being such a girly-girl. A baby changes everything :)

 You get to experience the world all over again. Its true. There is so much excitement when I get to see and learn "new" things all over again with Paisley Grace. If i were really honest, I would tell you I am so overly giddy about Christmas coming up and celebrating her first Christmas. We seriously will be going all out this year because I am so excited!! There is so much that I have forgotten about in life and she seriously makes me live everything out like it was the very first time. I have definitely learned not to take anything for granted. Its like having a baby has given my life a whole new fresh start and I am in love. I love being able to see the world through her eyes. Its the best feeling and the greatest experience you will ever experience. 
Lastly, You learn to let the small things go. I had all these grand ideas when Paisley came and how I was going to have a strict schedule for her to be on, and lets face it, that lasted about a week before I decided that was ridiculous. By nature, I am a busy body, and my life is go, go, go all. the.time so trying to stay put all day, every day in one place was incredibly hard for me. Its taken me some time, but I have learned to not sweat the small stuff and be so uptight. If Paisley naps, she naps. If she doesn't get an afternoon nap in, its ok. Things that I said I would never do, I do. Its funny how you have all these preconceived notions in your mind and when you are in the midst of it all, it all changes. If it makes your baby happy, then so be it. A happy baby equals a happy Momma!!


  1. Excellent post and all so very true!

  2. Thank you! Its amazing what kind of things you learn being a Mom :)

  3. 1000000% agree to this! I was super disappointed on my due date when my son decided to stay cozy for another week. Seriously why don't people warn you about teething? Last week was a bad teething week and I truly did just want to hide out. I am a huge lover of Christmas and this year I am sssoooo excited to start new traditions as a family of three. Glad you found my blog, can't wait to read more, new follower :)

  4. Preach is sista! Bummer about the bleeding boobs... I had a few blisters on my nipples but that cleared up after a couple days when we figured out how to latch better. And yes, felt SUPER not sexy after having a baby... UGH.

    XO/Lena @ Root&Blossom


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